Temperance is the space in which we receive grace. We are the vessel, and what we need is poured into and flows through us.
In writing, it is the balance between our inner and our outer life. We have one foot in the ‘busyness’ ~ the scheduling, the plan, the date with ourselves to turn up to the writing ~ and one foot in this flow of spirit and grace, receiving what we need to complete (or begin in earnest) our work.
Last Friday, I wrote a poem following a long hiatus from poetry writing. I was processing an experience of spiritual healing and the best way I know of deeply listening to myself is through writing. Writing in poetry form again helped me to remember that sense of flowing connection to what I need to both hear and express. It also nudged me into recognising that I have been caught up too much in my left brain when I have been ploughing through my most recent novel writing sessions. I have been dulled and distanced to the thrill of such connected writing. I have been too much trying to connect the dots, and I have not been allowing enough space for each dot to be reached in a more creative way.
The only reason that I fight against this current and get caught up in adhering to a numbing schedule is that I am afraid. I am afraid that who I was created as is not enough, won’t please others, won’t even be able to satisfy my own expectations of myself. I search for a rule, a framework, a schedule that will compensate for my ‘not enoughness’. But there is no rule that will connect me deeply to who I am and what it is my purpose to express.
By grace, we receive what we need to remember our wholeness. As writers, we remember that we had our voice long before we sought the tools to express it. We are ready now to feel that connection to the first time we let our pen move across the page to produce something that made us feel, “Yes, I can do this. I can be a writer.”
Whilst we are still seeking approval, whilst we are still searching for the universal rule that will give us what we want if only we adhere to it, then we can’t let go enough to accept and receive what is ordained for us alone.